Thank you Tampa Bay for making me right as probably the only person on earth to pick you to beat the Squeelers at home. It was another week with what felt like an excessive amount of bad games played all around. Which keeps all the predicting out of wack. I mean come on, no one woulda predicted the Chiefs to decimate the Pats so easily.
Anyways, lets get on with it while Im still in the mood.
Green Bay Packers
There is no reason to see an end to the streak of terrible games on Thursday Night stop here. Thankfully we only get a small dose of Trent Dilfer on tv.
Green Bay 44 – Minnesota 10
Chicago has no defense, luckily for them Carolina had no offense. The entire game will hinge solely on which Jay Cutler shows up. Pssst….it will be TD Jay and not INT Jay.
Chicago 21 – Carolina 17
Wow, this should be just an amazing game. So amazing that I reccomend you avoid it like ebola.
Cleveland 13 – Tennessee 9
St. Louis Rams
See what happens when the Eagles play a whole game? Yep they lose. Look for them to return to only playing the second half and easily beating the Rams after making them look good in the first half.
Philadelphia 34 – St. Louis 19
New York Giants
I am as confused as you as to the sudden lack of mediocrity out of the Giants and Dur Dur Manning. Also the Falcons arent all that. This should fall right into the Giants lap as an easy win.
New York 27 – Atlanta 21
Tampa Bay Buccaneers
New Orleans Saints
There really is no reason to think the Saints home dominance stops because of the Bucs. The Saints will win but the newly rejuvenated Bucs will make a game out of it.
New Orleans 26 – Tampa Bay 20
Watch as JJ Watt scores multiple times this week as he decides to play QB and throw TD passes to himself… seriously, he is the best all around player in the league right now. Dallas sucks and I can only hope they sack Romo so many times that It makes Jerry Jones cry for a 4th time.
Houston 27 – Dallas 14
The Lions nemesis returns to defeat them again. Yes the illustrious Lion killer Kyle Orton returns to beat them yet again. The Lions have no answer to this elite QB.
Buffalo 23 – Detroit 17
Andrew Luck is on a tear vs crappy teams. Lets see if it translates whem he takes on a less crappy team. (Spoiler alert: it does)
Indianapolis 40 – Baltimore 20
All hail the Blake Bortles era. This is the week where Mr. Bortles has his coming out party and rewrites Jaguars lore bringing them to the playoffs… next year.
Jacksonville 21 – Pittsburgh 19
Someone ate thier wheaties this season. How long will this last for the cardinals is the big question mark. I think it lasts this week as the Broncos are good but not as lights out as last season.
Arizona 30 – Denver 27
Kansas City Chiefs
San Francisco 49ers
Im not drinking the chiefs koolaid yet. They had a good game vs the Pats who obviously have issues but they are the chiefs and love to fuck up.
San Francisco 31 – Kansas City 24
New York Buttfumbles
San Diego Chargers
Ok, the chargers are a big question mark when it comes to running the ball. All the wins have come simply from Rivers willing the team to win. I saw problems with them dealing with a not so good Jags team and i dont see it getting much better until someone on the team proves they can run the ball. Cause if they cant then teams with just ignore it and stop Rivers and the receivers.
San Diego 23 – New York 20 (ot)
New England Patriots
Watch and see as angry Tom Brady forces the entire team not to suck and lifts his team to an amazing victory.
New England 27 – Cincinnati 24
Yeah… this will be hilarious to watch.
Seattle 50 – Washington 3
Bye week 31 – Oakland 7
Bye week: Dolphins, Raiders
There… picks are set. Enjoy week 5 kids. Also Fuck Thursday Night Football.